


Unladylike Behavior

by DragonSilk



Category: Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Comedy, F/M, Reader-Insert, Romantic Comedy, Slow Romance, The reader trolls Steve so hard., Trolling
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-06
Updated: 2016-04-08
Packaged: 2018-05-25 00:48:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,222
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6173395
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DragonSilk/pseuds/DragonSilk
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sure it was your idea, but Tony Stark was the one paying you to go through with it. So if this all went badly, you were going to blame Stark.</p><p>Steve Rogers/Reader</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not a huge Avengers fan so please call out any fandom errors. (I hope it won't be necessary.) This is set mainly after the first movie when Steve is getting used to the modern day. It was a one-shot, and then I got more ideas...

“I'll give you a hundred dollars to do it,” Tony whispered. 

You looked over at Steve, not entirely convinced. A hundred dollars was nothing for Tony Stark. “But I could get fired,” you whispered back.

“If you do, I'll give you a job to make up for it.” 

“I dunno,” you hedged, glancing over at Steve again. You did like the idea, it sounded like a lot of fun, but Stark really could afford to pay you more for it. “The idea of working for you doesn't sound that appealing.” 

“Two hundred dollars.” 

“Sold.” You held out your hand. You and Tony shook, and you looked back over at Steve.

It was pretty obvious that he'd realized that you were talking about him with Stark, and it was also obvious that Steve was suspicious. He was frowning at the two of you with his arms crossed in front of his chest. 

Well that attitude probably wouldn't last for very long. You grinned and wiggled your fingers in his direction. “I'll do it when he leaves,” you informed Stark.

“Just do it now.” 

You laughed. “In front of all these people? I may like showing off, but I'm no exhibitionist.” 

Luckily, Steve chose that moment to stand up and leave the room. You grinned and got up to follow him. “It's show time.” 

You left the room and shadowed Steve until the two of you were alone. He must have had some idea of what you wanted, because he turned around before you could call out to him. “What are you up to?” 

You pretended that his accusation had hurt your feelings. “I'm not up to anything. I just had something I thought you might want to see.”

“Well?” Steve leaned against the wall and crossed his arms. He didn't bother hiding the fact that he was still suspicious. 

You quietly walked toward him, until you were standing within an arm's reach of him. Then you looked around to make sure that the two of you were alone. 

The coast was clear. Well, except for Stark hiding over there. You grinned at Steve. “Look!” You grabbed the hem of your shirt and pulled it up and over your chest, revealing your white bra with blue and red stars on it. “It's a Captain America themed bra! Isn't it cute?” 

Whatever Steve was expecting, this wasn't it. His eyes completely focused on your bra, and they seemed to be getting wider and wider with each passing second. His mouth hung open slightly, and you swore that his cheeks were turning pink. His mouth started to move, but it didn't seem like he could get any words out.

You smirked. “Do you wanna see the matching panties?” 

“Wha?” The question seemed to snap him out of his stupor. “No!” He covered his face with his hands. 

You pouted. “You don't? But they're so cute.” 

“No! I mean... uh, yes? Not that I... uh...” Steve began to stutter incoherently. He peeked out from between his fingers only to turn away from you, his hands still on his face. “Could you, um, pull your shirt back down?” 

“Why? Do you think this bra looks bad on me?” You left your shirt up. “Or is it my body? Do I have a horrible body?”

“Not at all!” Steve turned back toward you, waving his hands, only to turn even redder when his eyes focused back on your chest. “Uh... I'm not a pervert! I mean...” He made a sound of frustration and pulled your shirt back down with his own hands. They brushed against your chest in the process, which just caused him to have another meltdown. “SORRY! I didn't mean to touch you!”

You bit your lip. Holding back your laughter was too difficult at this point. You decided to take pity on Steve. 

But not too much pity, because he was terribly adorable when he was flustered. “It's okay. You can touch me anytime you want.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I wrote the first chapter of this story, it was actually intended as a oneshot. This was quite a few years ago. I then ended up adding this second part in as well thanks to a lot of positive feedback (and also a random plot bunny). This is going to have more chapters however. I'm about halfway done with the next chapter, and I have some fun (I think) ideas for this.

As you stood in front of the door leading to Steve’s quarters, you thought about how entertaining it would be to just walk in on him. If you were really lucky, he might even be in a state of undress. 

You had to admit that you were curious about the body under his clothes. Unlike Thor or Tony, Steve never walked around shirtless, a fact that many women lamented. 

Of course, Steve wouldn’t appreciate it if you walked in without knocking, especially if you caught him changing. Since you didn’t feel like getting on his bad side this early in the day, you decided it would be better to knock. So you raised your hand and rapped once, twice, three times on his door. 

It took him a while to answer the door, and you were considering walking away when it finally swung open. Steve opened his door with a smile on his face, but the moment his eyes landed on you, the smile slid right off his face. Then he tried to slam his door shut. Apparently, he wasn’t over the incident in the hallway.

You maneuvered your body so that you were in his doorway, keeping his door from closing. He could try to shut it on you, which would undoubtedly hurt, but you knew he was far too nice for that. You jokingly placed your hands on top of your head. “I promise I won’t make any sudden movements,” you teased.

Steve tried to keep his face blank, but you caught the way the edge of his lips quirked up in a half-smile. “What do you want this time?” 

You flinched. He was still suspicious and sounded more than a little hostile. He was possibly the only man you knew who would be hostile toward a woman who had flashed him. Were people in his time really such prudes? 

“There’s a beach trip today. I wanted to invite you along.” 

“Really? That’s it?” Steve seemed confused. 

You shrugged. “Well, you’re cooped up in here when you aren’t doing Captain America-y things. So I thought you might like a change of pace.”

“Did Tony put you up to this again?” 

“No. He’s not even going.” You rolled your eyes. Tony was not as obsessed with Steve as Steve seemed to think he was.

“Oh, well, sure. I’d like to go.” Steve smiled, and it was decidedly an awkward smile. He seemed to be pleased by your offer but still genuinely confused.

You smiled back at him. “Great! Do you have a swimsuit?” 

“No. I haven’t needed one yet.”

“I expected that!” You lowered your hands to dig through your bag. You pulled out a blue speedo that was paid for courtesy of Tony Stark. You hadn’t lied when you said that this plan wasn’t Tony’s idea, but that didn’t mean that he wasn’t financing it. “Here!” 

Steve carefully took the speedo from you and held it between two fingers. “I’m not sure I’m comfortable with this.”

“It’s what all the men wear.” It wasn’t, but it was what you wanted to see Steve wear. Every single woman on the beach would thank you for it too. 

“Are you… sure?” He grabbed the other side with two fingers from his other hand and held it out. “This doesn’t seem like it covers much.” 

“Is it a huge change from your time?” It was a genuine question. You didn’t really know what swimsuits were like in the forties beyond the fact that women covered up more.

“Only a little, but I didn’t really wear swimsuits in my own time.” 

His expression was unreadable, so you let the subject drop. “Well, I’ll be back to pick you up in an hour. So go get changed!” Then you left before he could protest. Besides, you had a skimpy little bikini to change into. 

When you returned to Steve’s room, he was still wearing the same pair of jeans and basic button-up. “Did you put on the speedo?” you inquired. 

“Yes.” He was obviously uncomfortable. 

“Let me see!” 

He just looked at you like you’d suddenly grown two heads. 

“Oh come on. I’ll see it on the beach!” 

He shifted from one foot to the other and seemed to be studying the ground. “Can it wait until we get to the beach?”

You huffed. “Fine!” You grabbed his hand. “Let’s get going then.” 

“Don’t I need—”

“Nope!” You grinned and pointed to the large bag slung across your shoulder. “I’ve got everything we’ll need in here!” 

He reached for the bag and easily removed it from your shoulder. “Let me carry that for you.” He slung it over his shoulders without a single comment on how heavy it was. 

You just stared at him. You spent a lot of time with men like Tony. Men who were vain and self-centered and never would have carried your bag for you. 

Your staring made Steve uncomfortable. “What?” 

“Nothing.” You shook your head. “C’mon, let’s get going!” 

You led him down to the parking garage where your official vehicle was stored. Technically, since you weren’t going out on any official business, you weren’t supposed to use your car. You didn’t care. As long as you didn’t get into an accident, nobody else would care either. 

“Are we meeting everyone else at the beach?” Steve put your bag in the backseat as he looked around. 

“Yep.” Maybe. If anyone else showed up. Of course you had announced that you were dragging Steve, so most of the women working here probably would show up. Oh well, it was a large beach. You could make it very difficult for them to find you.

The two of you got into your car and buckled up. You carefully and slowly drove it out of the parking garage. Sometimes you sped out of the garage, but someone had reported you recently and you’d been given a citation. If you didn't want your car taken away, you had to drive the less than 5mph speed limit of the parking garage.

So you didn’t slam your foot down on the accelerator until you were out of the parking garage’s sight. Then you put your foot down on it. Steve shouted in surprise as your car lurched forward and you began to weave in and out of traffic. 

It was nice having a fancy government issued vehicle. The police always ignored you, assuming you were speeding for a reason.

“You should slow down,” Steve suggested.

“No thanks!” You sped up. “We’ll make it to the beach in no time at all!” 

Despite Steve’s many protests, you continued to speed the entire way to the beach, minus a few miles where you were stuck in traffic and couldn’t go anywhere. Despite the traffic, you made it to the beach in very little time. 

You should have factored in the fact that there would be other people at the beach. As you parked your car, two women went rollerblading by in just their bikinis. Steve just stared at them. “Is that, uh, normal?” 

“What? Rollerblading?” You knew what he meant, but you were feeling a bit put out. You’d wanted to surprise him by showing off your swimsuit, and those girls were stealing your thunder. “Sure, but I’m not sure why they’re doing it in their bikinis. If they fall, they’ll probably get hurt.” A small part of you hoped that they fell. 

“Bikinis? That looks like… like…” 

He was so cute when he turned red and started to stutter. You leaned toward him and smirked. “Underwear?” 

“Yes!” 

“Get used to it. That’s what most women wear to the beach. Look!” You pulled off your shirt.

“Stop that!” He covered his face. “We’re in public! It’s indecent. How do you expect any man to marry you when you just undress for people all the time?”

You rolled your eyes and shimmied out of your bottoms. It was difficult to do from your position in the car but not impossible. “Steve, I’m wearing a bathing suit.” You pulled open the car door and got out. You walked around to his side of the car and pulled his door open too. “C’mon, out you go! Time to face the modern beach world!” 

He simply gaped at you. “That’s normal attire?”

“Yep! Now out!” 

He slowly got out of the car but kept his back pressed against the side of the car as if he was afraid of getting too close to you. You wondered if he was just afraid of brushing up against something inappropriate. 

You stepped toward him, forcing him to press back against the car. His strength began to tip your car as you grabbed the front of his shirt. “Relax,” you murmured. “You know, we’re at the beach. You should really take your shirt off.” 

“I don’t, uh…” He began to babble incoherently. “Could you… I mean…”

You coyly smiled up at him, and you were about to offer to unbutton his shirt for him, when the two of you were interrupted.

“Captain!” 

You should have known that Coulson would magically be able to locate Steve at the beach.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm feeling very meh about this chapter. ): I'm sorry if it's terrible. I'm still trying to get back into writing. 
> 
> Also, wild plot appears. Steve completely doesn't get the motivation behind your attention-seeking behavior at all~

Working at S.H.I.E.L.D. was amazing. The job had fantastic benefits, and it made you seem like a superhero. Sure your job basically amounted to running errands and doing paperwork, but former classmates who thought they were the best thing ever didn’t need to know that. Oh no, as far as class reunions were concerned, you were out in the trenches destroying evil in your top of the line catsuit. 

Sadly, it also meant your standards for men had gone way up. While you weren’t super close to all of the Avengers, Tony Stark did often make the list of people you had to track down for a signature, and Steve Rogers… well, Steve Rogers made the list of people who needed to be couriered around. Not that he would let you do the job anymore. He kept requesting someone else every time.

Jerk.

But still, both men were devastatingly handsome, and now, you wanted that for yourself. Considering the amount of attractive floating around your job, it shouldn’t be hard to find a hot, smart, funny, and considerate man for yourself. Right?

According to Tinder, the answer to that was a no. In your efforts to find someone to love (or, at the very least, to get laid), you had joined Tinder, and you often spent spare time on it. Mainly the time at work that should have been spent doing other things. That may have been justifiable if you could actually find someone to date or flirt with. Except... you kept swiping left on everyone. Left, left, left, ooooh--oh, nope, left again. You frowned down at your phone and took another sip of your drink. 

At this point, it had to be just you. There were so many men in New York. The attractive ones couldn’t be concentrated at your job. There had to be hot non-coworkers somewhere. 

You suddenly stopped swiping. Now, this man looked good. He had broad shoulders and muscular arms, and he… Your eyes narrowed on his face. The picture wasn’t the best quality, but he looked familiar. You clicked the profile and looked at another picture.

Well, that was just gross. You’d just spent a good ten seconds finding _Steve_ attractive. Which he was, of course, but that was beside the point. You didn’t want to actively think about how much you wanted to press your body against his. 

You really needed to get laid. 

So did Steve, apparently. Well, no, he might not really understand the point of Tinder… You frowned, wondering how he’d ended up on the app. It didn't seem like his sort of thing. This warranted an investigation. You pushed your phone into your pocket and set off on a search for Steve. 

You started your quest with his room. He spent a good 80% of his non-hero time there, and it was the most obvious choice. 

Deciding that it was the middle of the day, and he had to be fully dressed, you tried to open the door without knocking. It was locked. So you stood off to the side--he wouldn’t answer the door if he looked out of the peephole and saw you standing there--and knocked on the door.

No answer. You tried a second time and pressed your ear against the door. If he was in there, you probably wouldn’t be able to hear him through the door, but it was worth a try. 

No response. No noises. 

Next, you tried the training room. It was restricted, but there was a viewing area that you could use to see if he was in there. 

Which he was. Of course. The one place in the building that you couldn’t go into. 

Well, it wasn’t really the only place you didn’t have access... but not the point. He didn’t look like he would be done anytime soon either. His t-shirt only had small sweat stains under his arms, and the back was always covered in sweat after he worked out. 

Not that you ever paid attention to his workouts or anything. That wasn’t something you were into at all.

You had two choices. Either you could steal an ID from someone who had access to the room, or you could convince someone to go in there and get Steve out. Neither option would be easy. Stark might be willing to help, but he probably wasn’t in the building at all. Unless there was some sort of emergency situation, Stark stayed far away. 

Pickpocketing would be your best bet... if you were any good at it. 

You groaned. You were such an idiot. It would be better to just make Steve come to you! You scampered off to your boss’ office, concocting a story on your way. If you told her that you were missing a signature from Steve on some important paperwork that was due today, she’d page him for you. 

After suffering through a lecture for doing paperwork at the last moment, you were able to retreat to your office and wait for Steve to come to you. It was a nice feeling. Normally, you were the one tracking him down. 

He stepped into your office with a friendly grin on his face. If pressed, you might admit that his grin was one of the things you liked best about him. He didn’t trust you, but that didn’t stop him from being nice to you. 

Well, as long as he felt confident that you weren’t about to start taking clothes off. 

“I hear you have some paperwork for me?” 

“Yeah… about that… Not so much...” you started. He frowned. “Oh don’t look at me that way. My intentions are pure! Well... maybe.” 

Steve crossed his arms. “Somehow I don’t believe you.” 

You huffed. “Fine.” You wanted to be indignant, but you ~~probably~~ deserved this treatment. “I just wanted to know what you’re doing on Tinder.” 

“Tinder?” 

“It’s kind of a dating website. Mostly people are just looking to get laid though.” You didn’t know if you should be disappointed or not. On one hand, you wanted to swipe right on him. On the other hand, if Steve were actually dating, you’d have to compete with so many women for him… 

Not that you wanted Steve. No way. 

“Does ‘get laid’ mean sex?” 

You couldn’t stop the grin that stretched across your face. “Yep. Usually it means casual sex.” He was so cute when he was trying to remember modern-day slang. 

He was silent for a moment, and then he pulled the spare chair up next to you and sat down in it. “Can I see this… Tinder thing?” 

“Uh, sure.” You were momentarily confused by the fact that he had sat down so close to you, but you managed to maintain your composure and get your phone out. You showed him how the app worked and then showed him his profile. 

“So how do I delete this? Is that the right word, delete?” 

He was so confused. “That’s the right word, but you can’t delete this.” 

“Why not?” He leaned back in his chair. “That’s my profile right?” 

“Well, kind of....” Steve wasn’t stupid, but you weren’t sure how to explain this so he would understand. “But you didn’t create it so it’s not actually yours. Look, I’ll report it as a fake, and hopefully, the site will take it down.”

He wasn’t happy with that response. He didn’t say anything, but he didn’t have to. His face spoke volumes. “This… thing… is for sex?” 

“Mostly.” You grinned at him. “That’s why I wanted to know if you’d signed up for it yourself or not. You know, if you ever get an itch you can’t scratch alone...” You winked. 

“Are you…” Steve sighed. “You’re making fun of me again.” You tried to protest, but he stood and moved to the door. “I’m not sure what your problem is with me, but I put up with enough people like you in the 40’s.” 

You frowned at him. “I didn’t mean it that way, Steve.” 

“Sure. Look I’m going to head out. Thanks for letting me know about that fake… I guess.” 

He left, and you felt like maybe you owed him an apology.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry that Steve isn't in this chapter. He's in the next one, I swear. Also, you lose an ally in this chapter but gain a better one.
> 
> I hope I didn't kill anyone's character. ):
> 
> Enjoy~

Stark was probably your least favorite Avenger to deal with. He never turned his paperwork in on time, and he always blew you off when you tried to get him to just sign the documents. Unfortunately, he was also careless and destroyed more than any other Avenger on your list*. 

*Of course your list did not include the Hulk. From what you’d heard, Banner was responsible for enough paperwork that the coworker responsible for him didn’t have to be responsible for any of the other Avengers. 

Given the amount of time you spent dealing with Tony, you really felt you deserved access to Stark Towers. Stark disagreed. So every single time you had to deliver paperwork or pick up paperwork, you were stuck waiting at the front security desk trying to convince them that you had a legitimate reason to be there. 

The current security guard didn’t believe you and kept telling you that he couldn’t even reach out to Stark unless he found your name on “the list,” whatever that meant. He threatened to throw you out if you didn’t stop trying to force your way into the building, and you cursed Stark with everything you had. 

“Give me a moment, please.” You turned away from the security guard and pulled out your phone. You looked through your contacts for Stark and called him. 

It went straight to voicemail. Of course. You hung up without leaving a message. Then you did what you should have done in the first place, you called Pepper. 

“Hello, Pepper Potts speaking.” 

“Hi, Pepper. I’m stuck downstairs, and security won’t let me up, and Tony really should be better about doing his S.H.I.E.L.D. paperwork.” After a brief pause, you realized she may not know who she was talking to and told her who you were. 

“Oh! I’ll send someone down to get you. Give me a moment.” 

It took you a moment to realize that she’d hung up on you. Dealing with Pepper felt awkward to you. You preferred to just deal with Tony directly since he was the one who owed you a signature, but Pepper always seemed to be the one you ended up dealing with. 

“Are you going to leave or what?” The guard’s voice caught your attention. 

You turned and stared down the guard. “Someone will be down to vouch for me.” _So there_ , you silently added in your head, mentally sticking out your tongue. 

Then someone was calling your name, and you looked around for the source, waving your hand. “Hi!” 

A man approached you. He held his ID up for the guard. “Pepper said to bring her up to Mr. Stark. I’ll sign her in.” 

“Fine.” The guard shoved a clipboard at you, and you filled in your name, the time, and the date. Then you handed the clipboard over to the man signing you in. He filled out his name and signed next to it. He gave the clipboard back to the guard who reluctantly handed you your visitor pass. 

“Thank you!” You flounced past the guard, smiling at the man sent to save you. You assumed he was an intern of some sort. “Do I require an escort to Tony’s office?” 

“Yes. I’ll show you the way.” 

You knew exactly how to get to Tony’s office, but you followed the man without protest. Stark may never trust you, and it kind of made you want to steal something from him. One day you just might… one day…

But not today, because Tony was waiting for you in his office. He frowned at you when you were let in. “I don’t see why you can’t email me the paperwork.” 

You glanced over at Pepper and wondered if she’d just scolded him. “I’m pretty sure you send my emails straight to spam or trash.” 

He smirked, letting you know that yes, yes he did do that. He held out a hand. “Fine. Hand the papers over. I’ll have my lawyers look at them and get them back to you if they don’t object to anything.” 

You sighed. “Not this again. You’ll **never** get them back to me that way! They’ll get buried under miles of more _important_ legal documents.” His lawyers always blew off the S.H.I.E.L.D. paperwork. Lawsuits were more time critical. If the papers went to the lawyers, you knew that you would have to make more copies and keep bugging Tony. 

“You know I can’t sign anything without having my lawyers look at it.” He smirked, and you knew he was enjoying getting under your skin. You knew he gave you a hard time because he liked frustrating you. 

You liked frustrating people, too. You could spot a fellow troll from miles away. “Come on, Stark! They use exactly the same form every single time, and you’ve signed hundreds of these by now. Yes, I acknowledge that I destroyed insert public place here. Yes, I know that S.H.I.E.L.D. is responsible for the damages. The estimated cost of repair is insert cost here. Blah blah blah.” You opened your folder. “In this case, you destroyed the Alice in Wonderland statue in Central Park…” You shot a glare at Tony. “What the heck?! I love that statue!” 

He shrugged. “I can’t help it. Sometimes the bad guys dodge.” 

You huffed. “Just sign the papers.” You held them out to Tony. 

“Fine, buuuut…” He snatched the papers. “Only on one condition.”

Your anger boiled over. “I’ve tried to swap you with other people so many times, Stark. You are literally the worst. No one will take you! Why can’t you just sign the stupid papers!” It seemed like this happened every single time, but even if you were used to Tony’s behavior, it never stopped being annoying. 

“Look, it’s a simple condition. I need you to do me a favor.”

“No.” 

He grinned, probably knowing that he had the upper hand despite your glare of death. “You just need to convince the Captain to come to a coffee shop tomorrow at one. Do you think you can do that? C’mon, you know you’ll enjoy it.”

You narrowed your eyes at him. “Why?” 

Tony leaned back in his chair and refused to look at you. “He’s got a date he doesn’t know about. It’s no big deal.”

“YOU! You created that Tinder!” You wished you had something to throw at Stark. “Steve thinks I did it to make fun of him!”

Stark chuckled. “You found it? Looking for a little love on Tinder?”

“Shut up.” Great. Now he would tease you about it. “Look. Steve doesn’t trust me. I couldn’t get him to go anywhere.”

“Have Natasha help you. She likes you.” 

“Natasha…? Black Widow Natasha? That one?” You scoffed. There was no way she’d help you. “The last time I talked to her was a month ago or something, and I think I said maybe a sentence. How would she help anyway?”

Tony shrugged. “She and Steve are friends.”

Of course they were. Of course. There were too many attractive women around Steve. It was a wonder that you were even able to get his attention sometimes. “Look. Sign the papers, and I’ll talk to Natasha. No promises.” 

Stark signed the papers with a shit-eating grin. “Looking forward to seeing you tomorrow!” 

You just snatched them away from him and left. What a dick. Didn’t he know that you were the only one who was allowed to put Steve in awkward positions?

\------

If you were honest. Natasha scared the daylights out of you. Well, maybe scared was the wrong term, but she intimidated you. You were responsible for her paperwork, too, but you felt like if you bothered her about her paperwork, she might hit you… or something.

Luckily, she wasn’t as destructive as the other Avengers. The things she usually destroyed belonged to the bad guys, and nobody needed to file any legal paperwork over that. So when paperwork for her floated across your desk, you often just dropped it off with her mail. 

So when you knocked on Natasha’s door, you hoped she wouldn’t answer. Yes, you wanted to talk to her, but at the same time, you really didn’t. 

Her door opened, and she stood there staring at you. 

You looked down at your feet. “Hi, um…” You didn’t know if you should call her Natasha or Romanova or Black Widow. “May I speak with you for a moment?” 

“We’re speaking now.” 

“Right.” The way her facial expressions never seemed to change was unnerving. Who knew what she was thinking. “Tony wants me to convince you to help me trick Steve into going on a blind date.” 

“No.” She tried to close the door, and you did your best to get in her way.

“Wait! I figured you’d say that. I hear you’re friends with Steve.” 

“You’re not very good at this are you?” She was glaring at you now, and you felt like she was holding back from shooting you. 

Natasha made you too nervous to think straight. This was going all wrong. “Sorry. I don’t think I’m making my point well.”

“Then make it.” 

“Tony made a fake Tinder account for Steve, and he has a date lined up for him tomorrow. He wants me to help, but I don’t want to. I’ve heard you’re good with computers and hacking and stuff. Do you think you could help me delete Steve’s Tinder account?”

She spent a moment studying you. It was a bit awkward. She looked you up and down, as if she were appraising you in some way. “Okay. I’ll take it down. Did you want anything else?” 

“No.” You shook your head. “Thank you--” You never had the chance to finish what you were saying. She’d slammed the door in your face. 

At least you were still alive. 

You wondered if you would get the chance to tell Steve the good news.


End file.
